Question: Okay so I really *really* want to go home and see my family. If my partner and I stay in an AirBnB and visit in my parents backyard, 6 ft apart, is that the safest way to do this? We would drive their in our own car. Like, if I’m wearing a mask and gloves, am I allowed to hug my Mom? I feel like there’s no information on how to do any of this safely and it’s impossible to find helpful guidance.
Answer: Same! We are in the risk mitigation phase of the response and knowledge and information on this front is difficult to sift through. The first question I would ask — does your family want to see you? Everyone is operating with different concerns and risks; some families may not want visitors. Figure that question out at the get-go. Great! Now, let’s say you’ve had that conversation and your family does want to have you come home for a visit. What’s the best way to do so to minimize risk?
What you’ve described in your email is probably the best set of actions to minimize risk== drive to your destination (see Q&A of 5/16 for more advice on that piece), keep all family interactions outdoors and at a distance (see Q&A of 5/21 and 5/12 for more on indoor/outdoor risk), and as always use your mask and wash your hands. If you can, you might also want to consider getting tested before you travel just to have piece of mind that you’re not asymptomatic. But not hugging your mom sounds bleak. So, I’d suggest that you ask another set of questions to think about tiered risk — what are everyone’s underlying risk factors and how protected thus far has everyone been from exposure? The more risk factors, the more precautions I’d take.
When it comes to underlying risk, I’m talking age, weight, health issues like cardiovascular disease, autoimmune disorders, etc. When it comes to exposure, I’m talking rates of community-level transmission and types of activities individuals have participated in (ex: hike in the woods== lower risk; singing with choir== higher risk). If you or your family are in higher risk categories, then I would indeed keep interactions distanced and in outdoor spaces. If you and your family are in lower risk categories, then I would have conversations with them about what, if any, additional risk everyone is willing to accept. Hugs? Staying in the same house together? Eating at the dining room table? Maybe your mom, dad, partner, and you decide to stay together as a unit. Now you need to keep transparent conversations about activities that you are and are not comfortable with. Does your dad want to resume his spin class at the gym? Other risky activities? You’ve decided to operate as a cluster, so you have to protect each other and minimize risky activities. Set expectations. Do your best as individuals and as a unit to avoid situations that expose you to many people. The Atlantic published a nice synthesis article touching on some of these points a couple of days ago if you want to read more.
Finally, I think you’ll see a lot of guidance about avoiding seeing grandparents. This will definitely minimize risk. In my opinion, the guidance also becomes increasingly untenable as time goes by. My grandparents are in their 90s. We don’t have much time left together in the scheme of things. They have decided that they would rather take the risk in seeing us than forgo the joys of being together. So even though they are in high risk category of individual, we’re going for a visit. Yes, it’s a risk. But it’s one that we’re all willing to take and we’ll do our very best to minimize the threat.